A few days ago after teaching, I went to a fast food restaurant nearby because I haven’t had dinner. As usual, I sat alone in my favorite table at the corner, eating my cheeseburger. I do not like talking to strangers, so I enjoyed my alone time.
Sitting on the next table was a woman, probably in her mid-40s or 50s. I was busy cleaning the table from trashes left by the previous customer when she suddenly said “Ugh, people always leave their trash. There aren’t enough employees to clean all these tables.”. I just laughed a little.
When I was eating, she started a conversation talking about the upcoming election (not promoting any candidates, just casually asking whether I was going to vote or not). Being a socially awkward person, I answered briefly. She started telling stories about her family and friends, sometimes asking questions about myself. Though I did not care enough to ask anything back, I listened to all her stories.
Suddenly, she asked, “May I move to your table?”. I was not in the mood to talk, but I said yes because I almost finished my food and I’ll be leaving in a few minutes anyway. Deep inside I prayed that it was not a criminal/fraud attempt (she was a complete stranger, so I had to be cautious).
When she moved to my table, she said something that touched me right in the feels:
Thank you. You are the only person who is not afraid of me. You listen to me.
I did not blame the others, though. She did look quite a mess, with messy hair and lots of plastic bags she carried. Maybe people were just extra cautious. She then proceeded to say:
I don’t like being alone, so I spend my time going out visiting my church friends and just going to new places like this. I might look scary, so people usually don’t want to talk to me, they think I’m crazy. I just want to talk to someone so I don’t feel so lonely. Thank you for listening to me. You’re very kind.
I felt bad. I did not even ask her anything, I did not join the conversation. I just listened, and she was very thankful for that. That is when I realized, everybody needs somebody sometimes.
Have you ever been in a room full of people and you still feel lonely? After a full day of meeting a lot of people, hanging out with friends, you come back home and lay on your bed at 2 AM only to feel lonely. You have friends, you know a lot of people, you laugh a lot together. You feel happy. But at the end of the day, you feel lonely, and you start questioning if you were ever happy at all.
That happens because the number of friends does not matter, what matters is somebody who truly cares. We need a partner, a best friend, a family member who will always listen to us and have our backs. And if you have one (or more) already, do anything to keep them around. Don’t take them for granted. It doesn’t feel good to be lonely.
Please, make sure that your loved ones never feel this way. Be there for them. Listen to them. No matter how much you disagree, just be there and listen. They need you, as much as you need them.
